Bring a Flamingo to gun fight!

Violence, in the real world we get as far away from it as possible (at least I do, you might be a nut job who enjoys beating merry hell out of kittens, to each his/her own). So why is it that the tools most games use to let us interact with the virtual environments seem to run on bullets, shotgun shells or napalm?

 

Well no today, today I'm thinking about the boom sticks with a little less boom and a little more pizazz, pop and just plain HUH?!?!? 

 

      

The groovitron - Ratchet and Clank

Why blast enemy bots to pieces when you can force them to shake their funky stuff to 70's disco sounds, with the Grooitron you can avoid murder on the dance floor and slip by while your enemy jumps, jives and moonwalks, far to busy to bother shooting you full of holes.

Wabbajack - Oblivion/Skyrim



Any weapon gifted to you by the prince of madness has got to be good for a laugh, right?
The wabbajack is a daedric artefact in the form of a staff with four screaming faces at one end of it, and it functions very much like all the other magic staffs that you can loot from most areas of Tamriel but with one major difference,  point it at an enemy and one of several random effects kicks in. It turns your victims into chickens, mud crabs, a shower of coins and most disturbing of all- a sweet role, which you can then eat! messed up.

Shrink ray - Duke Nukem  3D/forever

As if Dukes ego was not big enough already, with this green glowing gun you can reduce any hulking pig cop enemy to the size of a bug, and then you get to crush em under your size 14 combat boots, hail to the king baby.

Portal gun - Portal 1/2

This may be the most awesomely powerful non lethal weapon ever conceived by man or megalomaniac evil rogue AI woman. 
Developed by ex shower curtain and now big science military contractors Aperture Science, the portal gun allows you to connect two portals via a quantum space hole allowing instantaneous travel between to points- this means you can fall into a hole in the floor and fall out of a whole in the ceiling. Add to this the fact that there is no loss of inertia, lets you use your forward or downward momentum to launch out of the exit portal and over gaps far to wide for you to jump.

How is that a weapon I hear you ask, well when you can drop a crate into a hole in the floor and have it fall out of the portal you have just placed above that poor, innocent and heavily armed robot AI killing machine around the corner then you will see the result of thinking violent thoughts with portals- "I don't blame yo..."crunch.